Monday, February 24, 2014

Dang...I'M BEING DOUBLE PIMPED!!

It's that not-so-fresh-feeling. But, I guess I'll just hike up my skirt once more, and flash a little leg at all the Blogger-folk because today...
I'M BEING DOUBLE PIMPED!!
 

My FIRST PIMP is the vivacious, yet scrumptious
to see how she put me on display!
You'll either laugh, sweat, or cry in your pants a little
 

My SECOND PIMP, is the decadent, caliente pimp master herself:
She's here not only to pimp her book
 FATE INTENDED
but my skills as her beta reader!
Dang...I feel so nakey in my red stilettos.
 
Elizabeth Introduces: 
Beta reading by Tammy...

She catches typos with such clever clarity...
Titling (I read tit. That’s bad girl!! Is that where your boob goes to the left slightly? ;) ) her head to the right, Jane offered a little smile

I can go out! And Eve? She wasn’t a problem (at all). She was good dog. I will miss her so much.” (I un-lamed it for you by taking out the lame part. Ur welcome…j/k)

She offers book psychology...
Smiling, he asked, “You got it?” (if someone almost trips don’t you usually say “you ok?” hahaha…I said Trips…ya know, bc, well, never mind)

Mr. Perfect looked at Jane and blushed. (this is me…but all your Coulter men have been manly men…not blushers. You just wussified him with the blushing.)

Trip reddened. “Sorry, I mean angry.” (don’t redden my hunk!! Maybe wince or shake head)

Her heart nearly missed a beat when he lowered his head and blushed. She saw it. He blushed. That spoke volumes, right? (yeah it spoke volumes like wuuuuusssy…j/k. u actually played that one ok. THIS ONE only)
 
She picks apart your words wise (assed)ly...
Trip’s laugh came like rapid fire. (I’m laughing cuz I’m imagining bullets coming out of his mouth…oh crap, jane is dead!! He killed jane!! Maybe change that )

Her heart raced every time his thumb moved. She licked parched lips and swallowed (no comment needed…lol) hard (too easy..wow, she's quite the swallower…every pimp just lined up for her) as she studied him.
 
She offers new perspectives- The good, the bad, the weird...
Kissing the pup’s head, she set her on the couch then stripped off her shoes and her tunic. (oh yeah baby, get nakey)

People in love do stupid things, because it mushes up the head. And you remember what your father always says?” (wipe front to back not back to front?) “A fish rots from the head.(whoa…that sounds gross with my wiping comment!!)

Listen,” Sasha said as she twisted her hair and pinned it to the back of her head, “women make all the sacrifice, they give up everything to be shit on in the end. Take fatty.(who, me?) I bet his wife has spent her whole life building his family and his home… backing him as he climbed the ladder, and what does she get in return?” (a new pony?)

Jane smiled. “Can I help you, Mrs. Little?” (yes, can you make me bigger? No?)
Tracy Dugan was never a mother. You’re as motherless as I am…maybe even worse. Hell, at least I can pretend my mother abandoned me because she had no choice; you just have to accept that your mother is cow.” (ewww…her father is into beastiality??? So gross)

He relaxed his body on his heel as he propped her injured foot on his bent knee. His thumb stroked her ankle, his face looked concerned. “Any better?” (my thought is most people would have you prop your foot up, so why isn’t he having her lie down?? Then he can get on top of her and cue the 70s porn music that has been on vibrate on his phone this whole time, in his front pocket…)(also he can put her foot on his lap…)
 
She offers advice...
“He has a girlfriend.” Sasha reminded her flicking ashes into a diet coke can on the night table. (warning….don't drink that)

Frankie sat beside her. He grabbed her hand. “There’s no time for this and you know it.” (for me…no grabbing hand. He’s too macho for that.)

I’d say that’s some favor. Woo hoo. Probably lit the poor little nerd…” (can I get a description for this pesky eddie…man, he reminds me of some people…please make it annoying!!)

And she offers awesome praise!
So, she will whip your ass. There are bitches in this world and there are beasts, and she is definitely the beast of bitches. (love)

Jane rolled her eyes and waved him off. Jen was a waitress, but Eddie liked telling people he was dating a stripper. Made the men go ooh and the ladies go eww and somehow that entertained Eddie. (brilliant!!!)

Sasha,” Jane croaked, then cleared her throat. “This is Trip. Trip, this is…”
“I know who he is Jane. He’s the guy banging the lawyer on four. Right?” Sasha paused, but not long enough for either Jane or Trip to answer before she continued, “I know the type. I don’t need introduction.” (I heart sasha!)
 
Sasha grabbed the bottle of vodka, her glass, and went to her room closing her door with a bang. (I love her!)

 
Simply put? Tammy makes editing fun.
Thanks chick, you are truly all sorts of awesome!!!

AND NOW THE PIMPING OF FATE INTENDED:

Fate Intended is the third book in the Coulter Men Series.  Trip is the last of the Coulter sons to find love. He’s a handsome man with all the skills a young spy needs to succeed. But when it comes to love, he misses the target. Jane is a sweet beauty who may or may not be wanted for murder. She’s hiding out as a cleaning lady when chance brings her and Trip together. It looks like a happily ever after is in the cross hairs until reality tries to destroy what fate has intended.

Elizabeth Seckman is a simple chick with a simple dream…to write stories people want to read.
 

48 comments:

SA Larsenッ said...

Already crashed your interview over at Medeia's place. Great stuff!

Elizabeth - 'I un-lamed it for you...' Haha!

Suzi said...

I love when betas do that. Editing sucks, so it makes it more fun this way.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

*fanning self* oooo, I'm all hot now!

Pat Hatt said...

haha bullets coming out of ones mouth could be a good super power

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Those are hilarious! I have two critique partners that leave comments like that.
And no wussifying the men. Period.

Elizabeth Seckman said...

Tammy, Tammy. What can I say but that I HEART U Very much!! You are just like the little sister I never had. Now quit stealing my make-up!

@SA- Isn't she thoughtful?
@Suzi- you need to give Tammy a buzz. Just don't give her caffeine or feed her after midnight.
@Debra- it's sub zero here if you need to cool off ;)
@Pat- I've copyrighted that for my next book
@Alex- I'm actually boring. I've got nothing on Tammy!

David P. King said...

You're one popular gal, Tammy! Keep up the awesome while I check out this interview. :)

Elephant's Child said...

What a hoot. Though some men NEED to be wussified.

Jay Noel said...

That was some of the best beta reading I've ever seen. My notes when looking at my CP's work is pretty similar!

SC Author said...

I love those comments!!!!

Tammy Theriault said...

FEELING THE PIMP LOVE��

Shannon Lawrence said...

Nice window into critiquing. One of my critique partners has a fantastic urban fantasy with lots of humor in it, and it's fun running through, critiquing that and leaving my own smartass remarks.

Morgan said...

Okay... seriously loving this. Tammy and Liz? You guys rock. The pair of you = Brilliance. :) :) :)

Donna Hole said...

Yay for double pimping :) This was fun, thanks.

.....dhole

Neurotic Workaholic said...

I think the editing comments were so funny! I'd replace the diet Coke with regular Coke, though. :) And I liked your interview with Medeia, too! I left a comment on her blog as well.

Rachna Chhabria said...

Tammy, the editing comments are too hilarious.

Tammy Theriault said...

THANKS TO ALL THE PIMPS IN THE HOUSE SHOWING UP!

Annalisa Crawford said...

Oh wow, I want you to beta my next book, Tammy, but I'm afraid of breaking you :-)

Elizabeth - hello!!

DEZMOND said...

We do love being pimped!

Al Diaz said...

I have allready experienced Tammy's skills as beta reader. She is a lot of fun indeed. A different critic partner. Loved her. And dwarves love her too....with that kind of obssessive stalker sweet love, hahahaha. Run, Tammy, run!! They are coming!

Tammy Theriault said...

AL tell them no!!! ;)---- heel!!

Bish Denham said...

That IS a fun crit partner! The comments are good but delivered with humor and warmth. You're very blessed.

Elizabeth Seckman said...

@Elephants Child- Exactly. Trip is less alpha than his big brothers and that's okay.
@Jay, you must be fun too!
@Neurotic W, I am a Diet Coke fiend. It is my drug of choice...a bit of transferrance there.
HI @ Annalisa!
@Al, LOL. Tammy can handle a bunch of ornery dwarfs!
@Bish, I couldn't agree more!

Tara said...

Un-lamed it--HAHA! I wouldn't be able to edit after laughing my way through the comments!

Cherie Reich said...

LOL! The editing comments are definitely fun. :)

klahanie said...

Hey Tam-bare!

Oh yeah, some serious pimping going on. How good to see you pimping around with Medeia and the lovely Elizabeth. Well done n'stuff. Where are the group photos!

Gary the dude....whose comments never need an editing mention...

Karen Lange said...

Enjoyed your interview at Medeia's place. Will hop over and check out the other one. Thanks for coming by my blog for Alex's interview! Have a great week!

Christine Rains said...

*LOL* That was hilarious! I'd read a book just with Tammy's editing comments.

Lynda R Young said...

lol, un-laming is an important job of the critiquer ;)

Medeia Sharif said...

LOL. I couldn't keep a straight face if I were getting beta reader notes like that.

Tammy Theriault said...

THANK YOU ALL FOR COMING!! BIG GIRLIE HUGS!

L. Diane Wolfe said...

70's porn music - LOL!

Michelle Wallace said...

Liz & Tam-Bare
Are surely the perfect pair!
LOL! Off to Medeia's place...

Crystal Collier said...

LOL. Whew! Remind me never to put my first chapter in front of you, eh? Or my cheese for that matter. ;)

Cute shredding.

cleemckenzie said...

Have to have those keen-eyed readers who aren't afraid to tell it like it is! I'd say you're a match.

Kittie Howard said...

LOL. Up front hilarious -- hey, there's a book there!

TBM said...

don’t redden my hunk--I love it!

Carrie Butler said...

Pimptastic! :D

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

"Beast of bitches" IS brilliant. You're both hot to trot and get my applause. MK is one lucky dude to be part of the threesome. Of course, he's an awesome stud himself.

xoRobyn

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Fanny Barnes Thornton said...

I keep wondering where Jane and Trip will turn up next, and especially what they might be getting up to.
LOL.
All the best, Elizabeth.

Old Kitty said...

ALL beta readers should be like this! Nakey and pimpy!! All the best, Elizabeth!! Take care
x

Stephanie Faris said...

Gotta love a beta reader who tells it like it is...and in such a humorous way!

DMS said...

Awesome that you are getting pimped all around. :) Great to get feedback in a funny way- takes the edge off! Great to see Elizabeth's books here, too.
~Jess

A Beer For The Shower said...

This was fantastic, and admittedly, this is how we try to keep feedback with one another. Keep it as fun as possible. Make editing fun (if there is such a thing).

Also, it's true, real men don't blush or redden. They just grunt their approval of the lady in question. Two grunts? He's in love.

Samantha May said...

This is hilarious :D

*makes awful choking sounds to keep from laughing in the library*

*cue weird/concerned looks*

Elizabeth Seckman said...

@Tara, Yes, you would!
@Cherie, Definitely!
@Gary, shoot, no one brought a camera :(
@Christine, that's what I said!
@Lynda, invaluable.
@Medeia, Straight face is impossible.
@Diane, She's a character all right!
@Michelle, You're a poet!
@Crystal, Nope, no sugar coats from Tammy.
@Lee, It helps that I'm a bit arrogant when it comes to my words.
@Kittie, There's an idea!
@TBM, Tammy def has a thing for alphas...no other type men need apply ;)
@Carrie, you know the lingo!
@Robyn, Thanks. And yes, that Mark is a stud...I hear he's wintering on a snow tire in Detroit
@Fanny, hard to tell, with those spy types!
@Old Kitty, Thanks!
@Stephanie, yup
@Jess, yes it does-writers can be a sensitive lot.
@Beer men, Oh my, a grunting man. Tammy will swoon.
@Samantha, Hope you didn't get shushed.

Deniz Bevan said...

Those are some fun edits!
I agree with Tammy, love that line about referring to her as a stripper.